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Joke of the Day

"*Kanye trips and falls* SUCH A GENIUS! WHAT A POETIC DEMONSTRATION OF HOW HIS ANCESTORS FELL TO SLAVERY AND ROSE AGAIN *jaden smith cries*"

"Did you hear about the baby born with no eyelids? They used his circumcised foreskin to surgically replace his eyelids. The surgery was a success although he is a little Cock-eyed"

"I got tasered by a female cop the other night.. never have I laid eyes upon a more stunning beauty."

"Sorry 2015, but I just got out of a year-long relationship with 2014 and I'm not looking for anything serious right now."

"Did you hear what happened when Oedipus got flu? He became one sick mother fucker."

"what cross road chicken"

"one time a friend asked me ""how are you still single?!"" and the list of reasons is still compiling in my head"

"Drank the liquid from my Magic 8 Ball and now I can predict the future with even less accuracy than I could before."

"There are 10 types of persons in this world... ...those who understand binary and those who don't."

"What did Abraham Lincoln say after recovering from a 3-day drinking binge? *""I set* ***who*** *free?""*"