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Joke of the Day
"What are two reasons why men don't mind their own business? 1. No mind. 2. No business."
Next Joke
"Did you hear about the man with five keen senses? He still lacked common and horse!"
"I'm not in favour of student loans. I think people should get their own student."
"If you're ever feeling bad about your life just remember that there are people out there who bought tickets to the Kidz Bop world tour."
"What is trees' preferred drug? Water. It helps them get high."
"Why did the lead acid battery have to tell the truth? Because if it didn't it would be Li-ion."
"Why are Pirates pirates??? Because they ARRRRR"
"Her: ""My baby paints with her food because she's artistic."" Me: ""That or your baby paints with her food because she's a goddamn baby."""
"Why should you always knock before opening the refrigerator? Because there might be an Italian dressing."
"[eharmony] based on your responses, your perfect match is a trashcan.. [me] aww [eharmony] ..full of raccoons [me] omg I love raccoons"