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Joke of the Day

"""Oh man, you've got stretched lobes and piercings? I've got stretched lobes and piercings, too!"" ""Sweet! We should hang out!"" - Ear buds"

"Voyager 1 left the solar system 1 year ago and still gets a better signal than an iPhone in my apartment."

"Why are antivax parents so afraid of their kids getting autism? Because they know, first hand, how hard life is when you're a fucking retard."

"She said I have a face only a mother could love. I said ""that's not very nice, mom."""

"3 mods walk into a bar [deleted]"

"Whose son was Edward the Black Prince ? Old King Coal !"

"What is the only result for Ear-rape? Hearing AIDS."

"Chuck Norris caught all pokemons. With nokia 3310."

"Why do gnomes laugh when they go for a run? Because the grass tickles their balls. Merry Christmas!"

"Everytime someone cuts me off in traffic, an angel gets its wings Because I'm going to kill a motherfucker."