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Joke of the Day

"Whose son was Edward the Black Prince ? Old King Coal !"

"FB post from HS friend on pic: My boyfriend is such a dreamboat! My comment: So was the Titanic."

"It's official. The winner of the biggest upset in US presidential history is T-R-U-M- A-N. 1948. HUGE upset. Edit 3:30AM ET: this was a *lot* funnier when it was true."

"I stopped going to my colorblind therapist. He could never tell when I was blue."

"You can't make me believe there's a shortage of jobs in this country when there are 23 cash registers at WalMart and only 3 cashiers."

"Being successful is like getting pregnant.. ..Everyone will come to congratulate you but no one dares to ask how hard and how many times you were fucked."

"The Joker is in a room with Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump, and has a gun with one bullet, who does he shoot? Neither. Some men just want to watch the world burn."

"What do you call it if an illegal immigrant fights a sex offender? Alien vs. Predator"

"I attempted smoky eye makeup for a holiday party tonight, but instead it looks like I survived a bar fight, so I'm going with that story."

"Did you hear about the crazy fight at the fish market? I heard they found two fish battered"