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Joke of the Day

"Him: let's play a game of rhyme. I'll go first. Romantic Me: Panic Him: Fun Me: Run Him: love Me: shove Him: this isn't going well. Me: hell"

"Have you heard the joke about leaving milk out too long? I'd tell you, but it's cheesy."

"I hope at my funeral someone has the foresight to bring a Ouija board so I can live tweet Hell."

"Cop : ""Lets Do a drug test"" Me: ""Cool, which drugs are we testing?"""

"Learning how to say ""where the hell am I?"" in eight languages. Just in case."

"Swimming Is Good For You... Especially if you are drowning."

"Fun Fact: The term HIV is actually Roman for High Five Pass it on...then again maybe not."

"What's the difference between a well-dressed man on a unicycle and a poorly-dressed man on a bicycle? Attire"

"I can turn a case of beer into a drunk man. Your move, Jesus."

"9/11 was a national tragedy. So is 11/9."