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Joke of the Day
"What do you call obnoxious almonds? DEEZ NUTS!!! HA! GOT EEM!"
Next Joke
"Welcome to Ulterior Motors where our goal is to sell you a car and definitely not anything else"
"I wrote a status about unemployment earlier, but didn't post it. It needs some work."
"*doesnt stand for national anthem as protest against people who don't stand for national anthem*"
"Two scientists walk into a bar... Two scientists walk into a bar. The first asks for H2O. The second asks for H2O, too. The second man dies."
"What does a Japanese girl ride?? Niisan."
"A liberal, a moderate, and a conservative walk into a bar... the bartender says 'hey, Mitt.'"
"You say the punch line first. Whats the best way to ruin a joke?"
"Say, hypothetically, I was stuck in an air vent over a dressing room at Lane Bryant. What kind of legal issues am I dealing with?"
"What do you call it when you meet somebody in a bathroom at a conference? Pee-er to pee-er networking (P2P)."