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Joke of the Day

"*doesnt stand for national anthem as protest against people who don't stand for national anthem*"

"I wish I could be like Wall Street Seems to be in bed with a lot of people these days!"

"Women love to say ""sexy AF"" or ""hot AF"" on Twitter .... If I'd known being in the Air Force was that hot...I'd have stayed in !"

"What do the ""Damn, Daniel"" kid and pedophiles have in common? They're both back at it again with the white vans."

"Jesus: Those were the times when I carried you son Me: And when the vending machine ate my dollar? Jesus: That time you bought me a Snickers"

"A young woman walks into a dry cleaner She asks the elderly owner inspecting her blouse how long it would take to clean. Hard of hearing the man asks, ""come again?"" She responds, ""No, it's yogurt"""

"Nothing more American than getting on an airport's ""moving walkway"" and standing still as it slowly carries you to a Cinnabon."

"Hey Joe, don't think we can use this ad. Why not? We're roofers. Yes, but ""Hot shingles in your area looking to get nailed"" seems extreme."

"How many racecar drivers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? It's impossible, they only know how to turn to the left."

"Damn girl, are you Jamaican? 'Cause Jamaican me crazy!"