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Joke of the Day

"""As first lady you would be responsible for the White House china. Any thoughts?"" MELANIA TRUMP: Oh, Donald says he's getting rid of China"

"Why did the clown refuse to juggle? He didn't have the balls to do it."

"What's the difference between peanut butter and jam? can't jam peanut butter in your ass"

"FOUR RULES FOR DATING MY TEENAGE DAUGHTER: 1) get her home by 11 p.m. 2) so we can chill 3) i have mario party 4) be my friend"

"Why isn't the speed of light Asian? Because it never gets better than a 'C'."

"Eventually the entire written English language will be taken over by emoticons. Teenage girls will bring us back to Egyptian hieroglyphs."

"What type of blood does a keyboard have? Typo"

"If you ever laugh so hard that your ass actually comes off, shit probably stops being funny real quick."

"Why didn't the two tampons talk to each other? Because they were stuck up bitches."

"What did the gay deer say when he left the bar? ""I can't believe I blew 50 bucks back there!"""