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Joke of the Day

"Virgins in Paradise? Suck my balls, Al Qaeda; I got a jacuzzi full of sluts right here in Southern California."

"I'm not saying your dumb. I'm saying you're dumb."

"What's the difference between a lightbulb and a pregnant woman? You can unscrew a lightbulb."

"Once you've had black, you might never go back but.. Everything taste better on a cracker."

"What's the difference... What's the difference between a bowling ball and menstrual blood clots? You can't gargle a bowling ball."

"Old people always poke me at weddings and say ""you're next."" I do the same thing to them at funerals"

"GF: ""you're so childish"" me: ""it's my day too linda"" [we sit in silence] wedding planner: ""so is that a yes or a no on the bouncy castle?"""

"Did you hear about the stupid photographer? He saved burned out lightbulbs for use in his darkroom."

"Why did the doctor quit his job? He ran out of patients."

"Whats invisible and smells like carrots? Bunny farts. ( this joke made me laugh my butt of when i was a kid)"