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Joke of the Day
"Wanna hear my life story? tl;dr..."
Next Joke
"Lord please give me patience, because if you give me strength I may just beat someone to death."
"Have I told you how much I don't like the cars that can go up vertical surfaces? They drive me up the fucking wall."
"Yo mamas pussy is so nasty... they make you eat it on Fear Factor."
"That awkward moment when you text a pretty girl, ""my shirt smells like you"" & you misspell shirt"
"How many lawyers does it take to change a lightbulb? None they'd rather keep their clients in the dark."
"Where do geneticists store vegetables? In the CRISPR drawer"
"What do you call a bicycle made just for grandpas? A popsicle!"
"Why did Jimmy get into a horrific car accident? He let God take the wheel Edit: *Jesus.* He let *Jesus* take the wheel"
"Disease doesn't care if you are a celebrity, Micheal J. Fox has battled Parkinson for 22 years, and Jamie Lee Curtis is super irregular!"