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Joke of the Day

"Him: Favorite workout? Me: Pilates. Him: Why? Me: Because we lay down for an hour."

"The Americans are using a new type of rocket that constantly updates its Facebook status until it reaches its target. It's an attention-seeking missile."

"Why does a billionaire need a Bat signal? He is in a cave. How does he even see the signal? Why won't you just text him?"

"Obama is a lot like college Everyone wants four more years, but nobody wants to pay for it."

"When I'm at a business dinner I pretend like I'm choking so I can chug my wine."

"If your dog is fat it means that you don't get enough exercise."

"What did the egg say to the pot of boiling water? It may take me a while to get hardI just got laid last night."

"How do you keep a Redditor busy for hours? [Click Here](http://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/ou62j/how_do_you_keep_a_redditor_busy_for_hours/)"

"We could clothe the needy with all the extra fabric black dudes wear."

"[ENEM] Complete: Hey ________ a) Jude b) I just met you c) There Delilah d) Soul sister e) Hey, you you, I don't like your girlfriend"