25377

Joke of the Day

"What do you call a dead skunk? A stunk. My daughter made this up when she was about 7 years old. I thought it was incredible clever."

"Donald Trump's presidency is already positively affecting the economy. Alcohol sales have never been higher."

"I wanted to build my career on making chemistry jokes to cure my depression. Then I realized alcohol is a solution."

"A lady happily tells her husband, holding a testpack result. ""Darling, I'm pregnant!"" Tears running the husband's eyes, he says ""Hi pregnant, I'm dad"""

"Hunters Two hunters are in the woods. One passes out, so the other calls 911. ""How may we assist you?"" ""I think my friend is dead."" ""Make sure he's dead."" *Bang* ""Done."""

"So my sister attempted to commit suicide the other day and it made me so angry. I couldn't believe one of my own family members would fail at something like that."

"Why did the Samurais armor break? There was a chink in it."

"How does a religious extremist convert an atheist into a holy man? They use a machine gun."

"I like my coffee the way I make the women in my life... Dark and bitter."

"Q: Why did the Mummy go to the bathroom? A: To wrap itself in toilet paper!"