25265
Joke of the Day
"How do you keep an idiot in suspense? IT'S BEEN DECADES, SOMEONE TELL ME FOR FUCK'S SAKE."
Next Joke
"How much does it cost for a pirate to get his ears pierced? A buck an ear."
"Had to stop watching Game of Thrones with my parents tonight, because of all the sex. So I've recorded it to watch after they've finished."
"If I could have dinner with anyone, dead or alive... ...I would choose alive. -B.J. Novak-"
"What do you call a Mexican fighter pilot? Air Force Juan."
"Ladies. Even the most mundane chore is better in a Princess Leia costume."
"What do you call a forty something guy who masturbates all the time? Married"
"Seriously, ladies. If you just stop sleeping with douchebags eventually their species will go extinct. Look at the big picture here."
"What do condoms prevent? Minivans."
"What did Lincoln say about his experience at Ford theater? He said it was mind blowing."