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Joke of the Day
"Life is too complicated in the morning."
Next Joke
"White guys can't say the N word But they can say ""Won't happen again officer"" and ""Welcome home dad"""
"Damn girl, are you a Snickers bar because you're so sweet and satisfying and surprisingly hard and hold on, are those nuts?"
"I want to tell a joke here... ...but it's about sex and I don't think most redditors get it"
"[hostage situation] Any last words? ""Nah, I'm good."" If you insist. *puts gun to head* Say you're prayers. ""You are prayers. Lol."""
"You only live once. Make sure you spend 15 hours on the internet daily, desperately seeking validation from strangers."
"My career as a baseball catcher was cut short because I insisted on kissing the ball every time before I threw it back to the pitcher."
"50 cent filed for bankruptcy... That makes no cents."
"As I unwrapped the condom I thought to myself... ""This is a really weird birthday present, mum."""
"Why was the dieting Roman so thrilled? His toga size went from L to XL."