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Joke of the Day

"Women aren't that complicated. They just want an honest and genuine guy who will give them insincere compliments they might not deserve."

"Why did the pedophile go into the cave? He was looking for miners."

"Driving a BMW is like show and tell every day. Where you're Showing off how small your penis is and you're Telling the world."

"Morning! I was walking through a graveyard yesterday morning, and saw a guy crouched down behind a grave stone. ""Morning!"" I shouted. ""Nah, just taking a shit!"" He responded."

"How many lead guitarists does it take to change a light bulb? 100; 1 to do it, and 99 to say ""I could do that."""

"I remember watching this excellent porno back in 2002 so I tried to find it on the internet. In hindsight, typing ""14 year old porn"" into Google probably wasn't my smartest idea"

"What do an eagle and a mole have in common? They both live underground, **except for the eagle.**"

"How is a bell obedient? It sounds off only when it is told (tolled)."

"The blue man lives in the blue house, the yellow man lives in the yellow house, the purple man lives in the purple house. Who lives in the White House? The orange man."

"My favorite part of going out on the weekend is the 95% of it spent checking my phone."