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Joke of the Day
"Men are like placemats, they only show up when there's food on the table. "
Next Joke
"People that use abbreviations like ppl, wyd, hmu, and idk - what do you do with all that time you saved?"
"Find out this one weird trick fishermen use. Click bait."
"What's the difference between the 2016 Rio Olympics and the 2016 US presedential race? The Olympic competitors are qualified."
"Police officer: ""Can you identify yourself, sir?"" Driver pulls out his mirror and says: ""Yes, it's me"""
"Guy in USA:(phone) you ready? Guy in Australia: (phone) hell yeah Both:123 *each drop a piece of bread onto ground* Both: EARTH SANDWICH!"
"Why did the undercover cop throw a wasp nest at the drug dealer? It was a sting operation."
"My mate went bald ten years ago and he still has his old comb that he used to use . He just cant part with it."
"I've got a long history of suicide in my family; the good news is it skips a generation... so if I'm lucky, my kids will kill themselves."
"What do you call a pair of snakeskin trousers? Serpants."