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Joke of the Day

"Walmart greeter smiled at me. Long story short, the weddings Friday. Everyone's invited. Except Harold. HE said I'd NEVER find true love."

"What do you call a Mexican that loses a car? Carlos."

"What do you call an Asian person that is hit by a car? Hood orient"

"What's more dangerous than being with a fool ? Fooling with a bee !"

"Relationship Status: changing locks"

"Lawyer: ""Now that you have been acquitted will you tell me truly? Did you steal the car?"" Client: ""After hearing your amazing argument in court this morning I'm beginning to think I didn't."""

"A warhorse walks into a bar... The barman says, ""why the long film?"""

"If the band Toto, drummer Tommy Lee & singer Marvin Gaye ever got together and made an album... ...I'm pretty it would be Toto Lee Gaye."

"I was going to join the debating team... ...but someone talked me out of it."

"Some things you recycle, some you throw away. For example: Paper & plastic you recycle. Opportunities, love and your future you throw away."