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Joke of the Day

"A hole in my heart... There's a hole in my heart ever since Macho Man Randy Savage died a hole that can only be filled if I snap into a slim Jim"

"When I see a reality show, I can't decide which sucks more. Reality or the show."

"Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's a woman."

"Women shouldn't have to be in prison for more than a month. Because their period should be the end of their sentence."

"Why do people from Istanbul always swim? Because they're constant in a pool."

"What is Weird Al Yankovic's favorite pick up line? Hey, so are you familiar with my parodies? Yeah my PAIR O DEEZ NUTS!!!"

"Why wouldn't the pimp water his lawn? He couldn't trust his hose."

"I'll never become a vegetarian I think it would be a huge missed steak."

"You know what's a cool job?: Mirror inspector I could really see my self doing it."

"Still mourning the horrible death on 12/5/2013 Yesterday, a great man died. His name was Todd Mills, the inventer of the Doritos Locos Taco."