23839

Joke of the Day

"There is a big difference between hating you and losing respect for you."

"Shouldn't there have been ONE scene in The Karate Kid where Daniel's mom was like ""Why are you constantly in that old man's shed?"""

"My girlfriend told me that if I took her to get sushi, I didn't have to use a condom after. She's getting the raw end of that deal!"

"Why don't midgets smoke weed? Because they can't get high."

"What does a cannibal do after dumping his girlfriend? He wipes his butt"

"As I get closer to 30 I start to worry about more big picture things like famine and over population in my apartment"

"After handing a girl my mixtape I asked her if she was ready for TOTAL AURAL SATISFACTION not realizing what it had sounded like."

"Don't hate the player, play the player. They never see that coming."

"3 words that wins a girl's heart. Suck my dick"

"What's a Mexican's favorite sport? Cross Country."