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Joke of the Day

"I want to open a sandwich shop in the new Islamic State it will be called the infideli"

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"Two snakes walk into a bar. Turns out they were lizards."
"Damn you Jehovah's, suckered me in to opening my door. Sure,I'll read your literature, while you read my twitter. We'll see who converts who"
"Welcome to the punctuation store, where we serve all your daily punctuating needs! https://sites.google.com/site/thepunctuationstore/"
"My wife is going sky diving and I'm truly terrified The last time something that large hit the ground the fucking dinosaurs died!"
"What happens if Hillary Clinton gets so sick she dies before the general election? ...she goes to hell"
"What's the coolest answer to a multi-choice question? B)"
"""Because it would be hilarious,"" is probably not a good reason to elect someone to be president."
"Stop calling hurricanes names, you're just giving them the attention that they want"
"I would pay double my Netflix subscription if Stranger Things Season 2 brought back Barb from a parallel universe who then confesses her love for Nancy. You? What would you do for a clone dyke Barb?"