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Joke of the Day

"why is the bass player stuck outside? he doesn't know when to come in and can't find the right key anyway"

Next Joke
 
"What is ISIS' favourite OS? Windows XPlosion"
"Knock Knock Who's there? Moderate Islam. ....... That's strange. I could've sworn I heard a knock at the door."
"My real mom put me up for adoption because the cat was allergic to me :("
"My lesbian neighbors asked me what I wanted for my birthday. They gave me a Rolex. I think they misunderstood when I said, ""I wanna watch."""
"What's the song that coldplay wrote for you? Yellow. *Phil answers phone*"
"The little lizard was shocked when he found out how he was conceived. Anole sex"
"Cute cat ""Thanks. We dont let him in though cause he shreds"" You mean sheds? ""No"" [gestures to cat shredding to Van Halen on the back patio]"
"Some people say they get runner's high... I just get runner's OH GOD MY CHEST IS COLLAPSING I FEEL LIKE DEATH"
"BAE: come over ME: we live together im sitting right here BAE: my parents arent home ME: what is wrong with you"
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