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Joke of the Day

"Man marries deaf girl He writes ""we must work out a code: If I want sex I'll stroke ur left breast-U reply by pulling my penis ONCE for YES OR 62 times for NO!"

"[obama cures cancer, invents hoverboards, saves baby by killing 3 lions with a flurry of devastating headbutts] Americans: LION KILLER OMG"

"Why don't dogs make good dancers ? Because they have two left feet !"

"Why does carbon monoxide smell like fjbsjko"

"What's the difference between a pothead and a gay Muslim? Potheads get stoned by choice."

"Interesting piece of history... In 1872, the Arabs invented the condom, using a goat's lower intestine. In 1873, the British somewhat refined the idea by taking the intestine out of the goat first."

"What did the collard green do when his favorite song came on the radio? He got turnip"

"I want to make a special present for my dad's birthday. How do I make a St. Patrick's Day mocha? He says Irish coffee is the only thing keeping this family together"

"As a kid, I put snowballs in the blender to make a slushy. Snowballs was a good cat..."

"What happened when the sausage came in first? An announcer said, ""Ladies and gentlemen, we have a wiener!"""