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Joke of the Day

"What do you get if you share your Earbuds with all your friends? Hearing AIDS."

"The Pope is resigning. He will soon be known as Ex-Benedict."

"I tried this new oral contraceptive I asked a girl to have sex with me and she said no"

"Want to hear a joke about pizza? Never mind, it's too cheesy."

"I just ate 40 cheese sticks in a row! BAM! Looks like I don't need a ""family"" to get ""value"" out of your stupid bag!"

"If Donald Trump becomes President, The rest of us should be able to just walk into any hospital & start working as doctors"

"Me: ""Can I see the baby?"" Sister: ""Yes, but only if she's awake."" Me, through a megaphone: ""NOT A PROBLEM."""

"""Oh yeah, let's run to the hills. That sounds like a great idea."" -Ironic Maiden"

"Did you hear about the German republication of Mein Kampf? It's causing a lot of Fuhrer."

"Oh, what? Sorry. I was trying to imagine you with a personality. "