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Joke of the Day
"This may sound like a rape joke if you ask me Oh wait you don't have to."
Next Joke
"I'm at my most British when she says ""teabag me"" and I drop a sack of Earl Grey in her mouth."
"What is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a convertable? I keep one in my garage and one in my closet. Edit:typo."
"When people don't laugh at my jokes I just assume that they're not up to my level of comedy."
"What kind of guns do bees use? BeeBee guns"
"Dear @MSNBC, if it's something that Twitter told me 6 hours ago, then lets not consider it ""Breaking News"""
"""Honey why are there broken condoms on our sofa?"" ""Shhhhh, our kids'll hear you"""
"What kind of house does Fonzie live in? An ""A"" frame..."
"4th grade student: How old are you? Me: Quite a bit older than you. Student: So like 23? Me: Deal. Tell all your friends."
"Found out that girls do not like re-gifting. So, I was walking along and this girl gave me a major hard-on. However, when I tried to give it back to her, she just slapped me and ran away screaming."