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Joke of the Day

"How do you get a Warriors fan to stop masturbating? Paint his dick Cavaliers maroon and yellow."

"I'm anti-thesaurus, for lack of a better word."

"A man was arrested on Brighton beach today for throwing pebbles at the sea birds. He was accused of having left no tern unstoned."

"""I'm not even going to dignify that with a response"", she responded."

"How many gays does it take to put in a lightbulb? Only one, but it takes a whole emergency room to remove it."

"An enormous monster with eight arms and eleven legs walked into a tailors shop. 'Quick!' shouted the tailor to his assistant. 'Hide the ""Free Alterations"" sign!'"

"Did you hear about those two gay cannibals? I hear they're having a ball."

"If Monday had a face, I would punch it."

"""I've had enough of your shit"" ~ toilet paper on strike."

"[hat shop] OWNER: Sir stop or I'll call the police UNICORN: [surrounded by damaged hats] No one will believe you"