230947

Joke of the Day

"Sexist joke (insulting but funny) What do you call a woman who's lost 95% of her intelligence? Divorced!"

"When I see lovers' names carved in a tree, I don't think it's sweet: I just think it's surprising how many people bring a knife on a date."

"What's square-shaped and yellow? A yellow box"

"My friend told me that he never learned to use a bicycle I told him it's not too bad, its like riding a bike"

"Warning... Corny level is over 9000... What do you call a billionaire fish? A gillionaire"

"Do you guys wanna jear a hoke about dyslexics? I had a joke about Alzheimer's but damnit, I don't remember it."

"Question about The Catcher in the Rye In chapter 5, I didn't understand why the bus driver made Caulfield get rid of his snowball. He was just...Holden it."

"My mom let the street raise me, which is why the only things I'm really good at are letters, numbers, and talking like Cookie Monster."

"My kid threatened to hold her breath until I gave her dessert. Now she's a pearl diver in the Philippines & can afford her own damn dessert."

"What's the three toughest years of a bass player? Second grade."