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Joke of the Day

"When I see lovers' names carved in a tree, I don't think it's sweet: I just think it's surprising how many people bring a knife on a date."

"Knock knock! Who's there? Hamlet. Hamlet, who? I can't decide."

"A TCP packet walks into a bar... ... and says to the barmen: ""Hello, I'd like a beer."" the barman replies: ""Hello, you'd like a beer?"" ""Yes,"" replies the packet, ""I'd like a beer."""

"new joke I know this deaf musician, he plays a keyboard with one hand... and sings with the other"

"My favorite rapper is 50 cent Or as the British people now call him, 10,000 pounds."

"[at a bar] me: hey girl are u a wanted criminal girl: no me: oh ok [to a group of cops] shes not here, search the other building"

"What did the fish say when he hit the wall? Dam."

"I'm good at 3 things: counting and ironic jokes and punchlines."

"So Batman skipped church... Call that a Christian Bale"

"Chuck Norris can win a game of Connect Four in only three moves."