230915

Joke of the Day

"What are some funny offensive jokes? Title"

"I like to point at pregnant women's bellies and ask ""makin a baby, huh?"". Then point to mine and say ""got some poop brewin over here""."

"My wife's boss's name is Adolfo! I wonder if his family have always been against dolls?"

"I was shocked when they said I should spend a month's income on an engagement ring, but dammit girl, you're WORTH 900 favs."

"It matters not whether you win or lose: what matters is whether I win or lose."

"Ocean's Eleven? Ummmm I'm pretty sure it's a little older than that. Who is this idiot?"

"What does a five year old and a penis have in common? If it doesn't come when you tell it to, then just beat it harder. (I am so sorry)"

"I played dead in the living room to see how my 2yo would respond. He climbed on my ""corpse"" for 5 minutes then turned on the tv."

"Put on sunglasses. Now run past a crowd of people with your index finger on your ear screaming ""SNIPER HAS BEEN SPOTTED SIR"""

"How do you know a guitarist is sad? They start to fret."