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Joke of the Day

"I wonder if serial killers watch Criminal Minds like chefs watch the Food Network: ""Oh, bad move, I'd have done it this way..."""

"There's a really annoying moth in my room. It's been on my Silence of the Lambs poster for ages now."

"My girlfriend said she will leave me unless I stop pretending to be a hotel... I said, 'but you can never leave!' 'You can check out anytime you like'."

"I don't see countries or borders, I don't see color or race or anything that differentiates people. Seriously, I think I fucked up my eyes."

"Why are mosquitos religious ? They prey on you !"

"Found this in r/funny ""When I said to nuke the Chinese, I meant to put the takeout in the microwave!"""

"The girl at the Baskins-Robbins thinks Leonardo da Vinci was ""in that Titanic movie"". Now my ice cream tastes like stupid."

"I think I love my girlfriend... But I need to ask Rudy Guliani to be sure."

"I'm not lazy I chose to use my creative genius on mastering efficiency"

"What's the difference between Harry Potter and the Jews Hary got out of the chambers."