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Joke of the Day

"Hey, remember when AT&T told you to ""reach out and touch someone"" and you ended up with that restraining order? Good times!"

"""GIMME AN E! ... GIMME ANOTHER E! ... GIMME ANOTHER E! ... GIMME ANOTHER E! ... GIMME ANOTHER E! ..."" - Cheerleader who loves ecstasy"

"Have you heard of the two Mexican firemen? Hose-A and Hose-B."

"*wears one gryffindor and one slytherin sock to work to represent the internal human struggle between good and evil*"

"Why is Diarrhea hereditary? it runs in your genes."

"Can you at least smile if you're gonna be in the background of my selfie, Doc? (takes off rubber glove) ""You can pull up your pants now."""

"Wanna hear a joke? Feminism (I'm going to hell anyway, the least i can do is have fun on the way)"

"Did you hear about the guy who swam the English Channel with no arms or legs? They call him... *'clever dick!'*"

"Your honor let the records indicate my client was upsexy Judge: what's upsexy? [lawyer whispers to defendant] quick, this is your chance"

"We should get the Amazon Echo on Reddit It would feel at home in this echo chamber"