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Joke of the Day

"How many wife's does a catholic priest allowed to have? Nun"

"At what point in listening to your kid whine can you say, ""Sorry. This relationship isn't working out. You should start seeing other moms."""

"Christmas lights remind me of my friends. They all hang together, half of them don't work, and the ones that do aren't that bright."

"My wife said, ""Why are you always pushing me around and talking behind my back?"" I said, ""well, you are in a wheelchair""."

"I don't like it when a pretty girl with glasses takes them off, and her eyes were actually painted onto the inside of the lenses."

"Use chemicals to wipe polish and no one bats an eye.. But use chemicals to wipe the Polish and everybody starts to lose their shit."

"Bill O'Reilly What a fucking joke"

"The Pope walks into a synagogue the Rabbi asks, ""Why the wrong faith?"""

"Rock stars & earrings Rock stars are known for having multiple earrings or crazy piercings, but no one has topped Kurt Cobain, who went so far as to put a 12 gauge in his mouth."

"If you don't hate yourself by the time you log off, you're not using the internet correctly."