230079
Joke of the Day
"No one gave an f about his chicken when he was Lieutenant Sanders"
Next Joke
"This Valentine's Day I'm single by choice Just not my choice"
"I never ask my kids to call me, I just change the Netflix password and then don't respond to their texts."
"Plumbing My German plumber accidentally hooked up the gas pipes to my shower.... I guess old habits die hard."
"A sweet treat. I find my sex life is a lot like Nutella. Everyone loves it and has it all the time, and I'm just sitting in bed alone with a box of Ritz crackers."
"I met a guy named Richard... I said, ""Can I call you Ritchie or are you gonna be a Dick about it?"""
"What do you call a broken angle? A rektangle"
"How do you make cottage cheese? You shake a baby."
"How do you keep an idiot in suspense? [Click here for the punchline](http://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/1yya5x/how_do_you_keep_an_idiot_in_suspense/)"
"*Knock Knock* Come in."