230073

Joke of the Day

"So I called up the Captain, please bring me my wine. He said: ""ma'am, this is a cruise. Please don't call me again if there's no emergency"""

"I'm sorry you're breaking up [static sound] I'm about to go through a tunnel. Dad, we're right in front of you Uh..... go ask your mom."

"How do you ask a priest to hand you the spaghetti? Pasta pasta, pasta."

"How Many Surrealists Does It Take to Change a Light Bulb? Fish"

"What do you call chickpeas cooked in a waffle iron? Fawaffle!"

"Why was Timothy, the British astronaut, selected to go to the ISS? He was in Peake condition."

"When I see you, I'm a 10... On the [Mohs scale](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mohs_scale_of_mineral_hardness#Minerals)."

"How can you tell if a gay person is dead? Check pulse"

"There are all types of love in this world but never the same love twice."

"What does a memelord put on his sandwich? L-mayo"