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Joke of the Day

"The fact that people use the wrong ""your,"" ""there,"" ""it's"" and ""its"" yet spell ""Bieber"" correctly just kills me."

"Auto-correct is so crazy now a days... My mom meant to text me 'I love you' but it auto corrected to 'You're a disappointment.'"

"The only thing I've ever made from scratch was dandruff."

"What's the thing that is about 5-6 inches long, it goes into mouth and when you rub it back and forth it produces a white liquid? A toothbrush."

"And your 2015 Miss Universe is Columbia! -Steve Harvey"

"""I'm pregnant"" Are you kidding ""Technically yes"""

"Whenever I see a sign saying Fine Jewelry I think to myself, it's probably had enough warnings, why not just arrest it."

"My wife's maggot soup surprise is better than it used to be now that it is topped with coal ash."

"So I burnt my Hawaiian pizza last night... I should've put it on Aloha temperature."

"What did the rabbit say to the deer? What up doe"