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Joke of the Day

"My all time favourite joke. Apologies to 99% of you. What's big and white and sits in a tree? A fridge. What's big and white and blue and sits in a tree? A fridge wearing jeans."

"The only French I know are words for food items and the chorus of Lady Marmelade. Turns out that's all you really need."

"The beauty of vodka is that it looks like water. The beauty of the workplace is that water bottles are allowed."

"Obama has been endorsed by Warren Buffett, Colin Powell, Mark Zuckerberg and Bill Gates. Romney has been endorsed by Lindsay Lohan."

"My son asked me why girls pee sitting down. I told them they're lazy."

"Did you hear about the magic tractor? Turned into a field."

"How many prostitutes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just one, but she charges me extra for weird stuff"

"I'm basically just waiting to eat again."

"Why is the second traffic citation always easier to read? Because it's re-fined!"

"I lost 100 pounds with this one weird trick! Exercise"