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Joke of the Day

"Why are people who suffers from insomnia so excited at the moment? They only have to sleep 3 more times until Christmas"

"We'll take these $75 baby shoes. No need for a shoe box. We'll just let him wear & outgrow them on the car ride home."

"[Interview] ""Tell me your weaknesses"" Me: Well, I.. *wife busts in* He's a mouth breather, leaves the toilet seat up, forgets to take out th"

"I am so happy the US Supreme Court legalized gay marriage because I know that now the government and citizens will focus on the really important problems and issues."

"What's the objective of Jewish football? To get the quarterback!"

"If Trump becomes president, I would really like to see how Republicans are going to defend him for doing the same thing Obama did: Nothing."

"I just ate 40 cheese sticks in a row! BAM! Looks like I don't need a ""family"" to get ""value"" out of your stupid bag!"

"I heard Kim Jong-Un built a new private refrigerator He calls it a ""grocery store"". Wakka wakka!"

"I went to kuwait, found no squirrels there.. No animal can sustain a burst of oil everytime they bury a nut."

"What did Optimus Prime say to Arcee? Have you ever blown a Transformer?"