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Joke of the Day

"I am so happy the US Supreme Court legalized gay marriage because I know that now the government and citizens will focus on the really important problems and issues."

"Dear Jesus- please let all my texts go to the correct person- Amen"

"What is the hardest part in coming out of the closet? Telling your parents you are gay."

"It's only 8:30 am and I've managed to work ""rock out with your cock out"" into a conversation. This day is already a winner."

"I am the worst writer in the world until I finish writing, at which point I immediately become a goddamn genius. This is relatable content."

"Orange Jews 100% Concentrated."

"For just 2 quarters a day, you can send 2 quarters a day to African children. African children love collecting quarters."

"Wired: ""Machine learning will TAKE OVER THE WORLD!"" Amazon: ""We see you bought a wallet. Would you like to buy ANOTHER WALLET?"""

"If I could be any enzyme It would be DNA helicase so I could unzip your genes."

"Why did the console peasants walk across the road? To render the building on the other side."