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Joke of the Day
"The 7 Drug Habits Of High, Ineffective People"
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"Jesus take the wheel. No that's a book. A penny. A rock. DAMMIT JESUS DIDN'T YOU TAKE THAT ENGLISH AS A SECOND LANGUAGE CLASS I RECOMMENDED"
"Why are linear equations so easy to interrogate? Because they always give you a straight answer."
"I can fake my way through most conversations with my kids if I just look up from my phone every time they stop talking and say ""no."""
"Doctor: ok, just need a urine sample & we're done. Me handing him my boxers: I'm in a rush. Just wring these out."
"Donald Trump is writing a children's book about running for President He's going to title it, ""Marco's Little Adventure"""
"Why couldn't the skeleton pay his bus fare? Because he was skint."
"The amount of time my phone spends plugged in you may as well call it a landline"
"Why is my algebra textbook so sad? It has a lot of problems."
"I try to refrain from farting while I masturbate. For I am a gentleman."