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Joke of the Day

"My German plumber accidentally hooked up my gas line to my shower... Looks like old habits die hard."

"Probably the worst time to say ""Or what?!"" is when the cops are telling you to drop the gun and step out of the vehicle."

"The fact that there is even such a thing as ugly hookers tells you pretty much all you need to know about men."

"Why did the crab jump out of the water? Because the SeaWeed.."

"Hi, I'm your car's radio. I'll be playing terrible music during your trip, but once you get out of the car I'll play your favorite song."

"Why did Sarah fall off the swings She had no arms ... Knock knock Who's there Not Sarah"

"How do you keep a blonde in suspense? I'll tell you tomorrow."

"Why did the chicken fall in the well? He couldn't see that well."

"Walnuts make my every cookie a game of Minesweeper."

"Did you hear about the restroom for pencils? It's for #2 only."