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Joke of the Day
"Never trust trees. They're shady."
Next Joke
"I bet Dame Judi Dench has a pretty nice apartment. #cribs"
"I put sea salt on my seafood, so they can be reunited. Because I like happy endings."
"[Dirty] Did you know pigeons die after they have sex? At least, the one I fucked did."
"Me on Masterchef: Ive made a roasted pork kebab breaded with buttermilk cornbread and served with a tomato reduction Them: This is a corndog"
"Apparently a lion has won a talent show in South Africa The judges said it had roar talent"
"What is the difference between a pizza and a black guy? A pizza can feed a family of four!"
"Why couldn't the lifeguard save the hippie? He was too far out, man"
"A children's museum SOUNDS like a good idea... ...but I would imagine it's hard to breathe inside those little glass cases."
"How do you start an insect race ? One two flea - go"