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Joke of the Day

"I once had a midget for a wife. until I took an arrow to the knee."

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"Whats the difference between a girl and a washing machine? When I dump a load in the washing machince, it doesnt follow me around"
"what do they call a hot looking girl who will love you and stay devoted to you forever? let me know once you find one"
"Men should never wear a Saran Wrap skirt to a job interview... They'll clearly see yer nuts"
"Why does a golfer wear two pairs of pants? Just in case he gets a hole in one!"
"Police arrested two kids yesterday. one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. They charged one, and let the other one off."
"If Abraham Lincoln was alive today... He'd be desperately clawing at the lid of his coffin."
"What do you call an old film composer? Hans Zimmer-frame"
"When in Canada, what is Bruce Lee's favorite vegetable? Carrot-eh"
"Did you hear about the ghost who got put in prison? He was charged with possession."