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Joke of the Day

"So this morning I bought a pair of shoes from a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with, but I've been tripping all day."

"SipXecs - I don't always SipX But when I do, I sip Dos Equis nerdjokes"

"I was trying to solve an equation when I realised that the minus button on my calculator was broken... On the plus side, it still worked."

"I bought a pack of pencils and one was unsharpened. I thought it was pretty pointless"

"Did you hear about that brilliant Irish investor? His money just keeps Dublin"

"The only real difference between my 20s and my 30s is that now I make all my bad decisions before midnight."

"Hide a metal rake in your leaf pile to keep the neighborhood kids from messing it up."

"English is difficult to learn. It can be taught through tough thorough thought, though."

"""How much would you say you read the Bible?"" ""Well, I don't read it religiously."" Bud-dum tss, I hate myself."

"What's the difference between a golfball and a woman's 'G' spot? A man will actually spend 20 minutes looking for a golfball... Alternative punchline: Man can actually hit a golfball..."