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Joke of the Day

"Why does Paris have tree lined streets? Because the German army likes to march in the shade."

"Every time my husband hides my pants, I have sex with him. Don't tell him I have more than one pair."

"Someone sly sheared sleeping sheep. Talk about shear terror."

"I won't travel to certain regions of the world simply because of the spiders that reside there."

"My friend once talked me out of jumping off a building with my new homemade glider wings. He said I didnt understand the gravity of the situation."

"How do you know when you're watching too much porn? Your MILF tells you so."

"I don't know what Hitler's favourite drink was. But he sure as hell didn't like juice."

"Freedom Knock Knock Joke ""Knock knock"" ""who's there"" ""freedom"" ""freedom who?"" ""Just kidding, freedom doesn't knock freedom rings"""

"I'm trying this Paleo lifestyle where I live in constant fear and die at the age of 28"

"ALERT: If u got a message from me saying ""I Need To Contact Poopy Woman"" that was a hacker or error. I called the cops and they are mad"