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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between Helen Keller and a redneck Helen Keller got famous for not being able to read"

"I'm not calling you a slut, But if you had a password for your vagina it would be ""1234"""

"Donald Trump went to graduate school and now he has a PuD Pretty 'uge d...isertation"

"When ever I make Eggs Benedict, I always serve it on a hubcap. Cause there's no plate like chrome for the hollandaise."

"What is the difference between a musician and a dead body? One composes and the other decomposes."

"I love the lines men use to get us into bed. ""Please I'll only put it in for a minute."" What am I a microwave?"

"Why do mice have long tails ? Well they'd look silly with long hair !"

"We won't know we've truly made it as a society until computers in movies stop making beeping noises"

"When I go to Subway I always bring a pair of pants that are 10 times to big for me and high five all the workers."

"Automatic flusher Automatic soap dispenser Automatic sink Automatic paper towel dispenser N O W T O U C H T H E D O O R H A N D L E"