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Joke of the Day
"i have been trying to teach my dog to speak English.... but his skills are ruff"
Next Joke
"What is Whitney Houston's favorite coordination? HAND-EYYYYEEEEE-EEEE-IIIII!!!"
"Neil Degrasse Tyson and Mike Tyson have something common... I don't understand what either one is saying, but I know I'll end up seeing stars."
"[The Second Coming] Jesus:""People of the Earth! I have returned with news of God's love an-"" Voice from the crowd:""DO THE WINE TRICK"""
"What disease do basement dweller mosquitos give you? M'laria"
"Cartoonist found dead in home . Details are sketchy."
"FDA should require Starbucks baristas/cashiers to be calorie counters. ""Here's change of 50 and that's 1,073 calories of your Venti Frap."""
"My grandma has so many wrinkles she has to screw her hat on."
"I won a contest to go trick or treating with Arnold Schwarzenegger this year. Wad thinking of going as Beethoven. He'll be Bach."
"What do you do when your dishwasher stops working? Punch her in the face."