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Joke of the Day

"Why was Macaulay Culkin an easy target for Michael Jackson? Because he was home alone."

"Steven Hawking came back from his first date in 10 years. His Glasses were smashed, he had a broken wrist, twisted ankle and grazed knees. Apparently she stood him up."

"I stopped understanding math when the alphabet decided to get involved."

"How near was the boy to his dad's tobacco stash before getting busted? Close... but no cigar."

"You have a man, woman and douchebag who walk into a bar and order a triple shot... ...and Caitlyn Jenner takes it to the face !"

"I'm 82 and I have the body of a 25-year-old supermodel. But it takes up too much room in my freezer... any suggestions?"

"What do you call it when a girl throws a tantrum during her period? An ovary-action."

"Do you know why scuba divers roll backwards off boats? Because if they rolled forward they would just go into the boat"

"A man goes to Macy's to buy a sweater. He swipes his card but it didn't register. The cashier asks him to try his card again and the man replies, ""I already did and it fits great!"""

"Did you hear about the rabbi who had a wallet made out of foreskins? He could rub it and turn it into a suitcase."