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Joke of the Day

"i am asking my dad ""Dad you look tired."" ""Oh, you mean the dark circles under my eyes? Those are the shadows of my great deeds."""

Next Joke
 
"Sleeping thoughts Sometimes when I go to sleep I like to look at the stars and just think... what the hell happened to my roof!?"
"Feed a fish to a man, and you have fed him for a day. Feed a man to a fish, and you have appeased Dagon. You have done well. we crawl we rise"
"What would happen if Donald Trump was about to be assassinated? Secret Service would shout ""Donald, Duck!"""
"I bet a lot more people would read the Bible if it was called The Adventures of Jesus and Friends."
"Have you heard about the new corduroy pillows? They're making headlines everywhere."
"What does Joaquin Phoenix say when a car almost hits him? ''Hey! I'm Joaquin here!''"
"My ex wife recently told me I run away from my problems. Apparently not far enough."
"What's the difference between jam and marmalade? I can't marmalade my dick up your ass."
"Knock knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo hoo? It's just a joke -- you don't have to cry about it."