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Joke of the Day

"I asked a pregnant woman what cup size she was. She said 500ml."

"How many birds does it take to change a lightbulb? Swan"

"I would never wanna fuck ""feminists"" Because i dont fuck children"

"What does a South Carolina cop do when a panda runs away from him? Shoots him 8 times in the black."

"What did Meghan Trainor say when she got mugged? Please sir, I don't want any treble."

"""Did you go shopping for my birthday present?"" ""Yeah and I found the perfect thing."" ""What thing is that?"" ""Nothing!"""

"What do you call a group of brain surgeons? A neural network."

"Pros are good and cons are bad, so... What's the opposite of constitution?"

"I'm not convinced faith can move mountains, but I know what it can do to skyscrapers. (Come on, it's been 15 years.)"

"I was feeling depressed. . I was feeling depressed so I went to the doctor to get a blood test. A week later he called me back with the results and said B positive, it's in your blood."