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Joke of the Day

"Why did the lawyer go to the tailor? He wanted a law-suit"

"What does a slave owner do with his slaves when he's finished with them? Races 'em."

"Customer: I thought the meals here were supposed to be like mother used to make. Waiter: They are. She couldn't cook either."

"I can never write a joke without being criticized about the punchline So fuck you guys"

"Money went much further in the 1980s when you could peel the price stickers off milk cartons and stick them on anything you needed."

"Whats an iPhone 7's favorite brand of frozen pizza? Not Jack's."

"What did the football fan say to the paedophile footballer? Come on my son."

"Why isn't there golf in the Paralympics? Because it would be really awkward asking what their handicap was."

"Where do babies come from? Storks bring white babies. Crows bring black babies. So what brings no babies? Swallows"

"No I in team Word of advice; if anyone ever gives you the ""There is no I in team!"" speach, you look him dead in the eye and say ""true, but there is a 'U' in dumb."""