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Joke of the Day
"How do you kill a vampire dinosaur? You stakeasaurus."
Next Joke
"How many Catholic priests does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Nun. But really, its easier to rape little boys in the dark."
"You had me at ""we've got the place surrounded"""
"How many dicks can Kim Jong-Un suck at once? He chooses to keeps that information secret."
"Better names for porcupines: Needle Beaver Battlepig Hurty Squirrel Flail Monster Cactus Rat Capy-scare-uh Death otter Revenge Possum"
"Instead of complaining that it's hard to remove glitter, accept it. Embrace it. You are a shiny person now."
"Took a poop without my phone. Had no idea what to do with my hands. Did the Macarena. What a day."
"If you want to play frisbee Buy a frozen pizza instead of a frisbee And when you get hungry from playing frisbee Eat your frisbee"
"Did you hear about the guy who kept shooting birds? He was charged with First Degree Burder."
"Am sticking to my resolution this year 800x600"